Pregnancy. Labour. Feeding. Sleeping. Weaning. TV. Clothes…
Someone will have an opinion or a helpful bit of advice or a sideways glance as you make decisions with your pregnancy or your baby. It starts even before you HAVE the baby. The decisions to try and have a baby, or if the baby was unplanned, did you consider due dates? What if it’s born on Christmas Day?? Or my birthday?? 🙈
9 months of unknown!
Then comes the pregnancy itself! I really enjoyed being pregnant. I have never felt more confident within myself or my body and it does bring to light the crazy, miracle that is happening. I enjoyed reading my What to expect when you’re expecting guide each week and marking the milestones. But still you get those questions. “Do you know what you’re having?” We didn’t find out, some people do. Maybe next time we will find out. Maybe we won’t. “Should you be eating/drinking that while pregnant?” “You’re going to Vegas while pregnant?” “How much exercise are you doing to keep yourself in shape?” “You’re working right up to your due date?” – Now, you have all these arguments in your own head and they can seem like the be all and end all but you know your body, it is YOUR body and although that little ‘shrimp’ is part of the wider family community, it’s your responsibility and your choices! I did cut out most of the ‘no-no’ foods (smoked salmon, patè, soft cheese) but I had the occasional small glass of Prosecco when celebrating a wedding or birthday (I was 6 months pregnant for our 1st wedding anniversary!) I flew at 10 weeks to Vegas and LA and then again at 26 weeks to Ibiza and it wasn’t a big deal! I went to pregnancy yoga for 10 weeks- that was it (although maybe next time I will do slightly more as I am paying for it now!) And yes I worked up to a week before my due date! Pregnancy done!
At around 18 weeks your midwife will ask you to start thinking about your elusive birth plan! A plan of the birth, a story of what you want, a magical narrative that will mark the arrival of your baby, the ideal situation! I had the ideal situation planned out in my head – birthing centre, birthing pool, no drugs, gas and air, Adam to tell me the sex, skin to skin, lots of photos, Adam to cut the cord, beautiful! This is a wonderful way to prepare yourself but the reality might not be that! As I found out! “Are you planning on having the baby in hospital? “Who are your birthig partners?” “Are you going to have drugs?” “What visitors will you allow to the hospital?” Initially, I felt like a compete failure. I didn’t push, I had an epidural, I didn’t dilate, I ended up having an emergency c section. You get so caught up in this idea of what birth should be and how people will judge you! I ended up on the labour ward hocked up to every machine, I had every drug possible due to complications. Obviously Adam was there but I’m so glad I also had my mum to be the straight thinker and ask the questions me and Adam couldn’t. We had an army of visitors to the hospital and I wouldn’t have had it any other way! The love and support helped me to move onto the next chapter after the labour! However, when all is said and done, I would do it again in a HEARTBEAT and when I think back all of the ‘before’ is worth that first 30 seconds of their new life.
Newborn baby, Newborn Parents
When you bring your baby home you have such a mix of emotions. It’s a scary, exciting time. You are filled with all of this love and worry and it’s hard to distinguish between them. You feel this pressure to make the right decisions and you become your own worst enemy! You become the judge! “Am I going to persevere with breastfeeding?” “Should I give her a dummy?” “Is she sleeping enough?” “Do I look ok?” “Do I feel ok?” Breastfeeding isn’t for everyone. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t! IT ISNT THE END OF THE WORLD! We managed 3 weeks before I decided to go to the bottle. Some people get to 6 months+! You feel like you need to do it, midwifes do add to the pressure. I mean, at ante natal they tell you all the pros and it is best but sometimes it comes at a cost. I was stressed, Evelyn lost weight, she was stressed. So I made he decision for us! I lasted 5 days before I gave her a dummy. So what! It helps! Haha. They sleep a lot at the start and you worry. Then they DON’T sleep and you worry. Then you get their routine and you chill! I stressed about my appearance after she was born. It was crazy and ridiculous! Your body has been through so much- cut yourself some slack!! 👍
“Such a big girl!”
Where does the time go? Seriously! My little girl is now 6 months old and growing and changing so much! This age come with a whole new bag of questions and decisions that you feel you’ll be judged on. “What type of weaning are you doing?” “Are you making all of your own baby foods?” “What time does she go to bed?” “Is she in her own room yet?” Wow. Just looking at these makes me realise my tiny baby had officially grown up! There are apparently LOADS of different approaches to weaning! I am going with the feeding my baby food and seeing what happens approach. Someone recommended just “giving her a pork chop to chew on” – Erm, no. Let’s start with some purée and work our way up! Sometimes I give her things on her tray to play with and eat. sometimes I feed her myself! It doesn’t have to be so strict and ridgid. Again, whatever you think is best! In all honesty I haven’t made loads of my own baby food, the stuff on the shelves is 100% natural and organic! Our bedtime routine is pretty casual but we have a good baby who enjoys her nightly sleep (sorry)! We are putting her in her own room this week so I shall keep you posted on that front!!
Anyway, having a baby makes you a lot stronger and selfless and I know that most people just want to help! Take no notice of the judgers and do what you feel is best! ❤️
Oh and she LOVES cbeebies! 😉